I now have an outside income that will support me (albeit meagerly) for at least the next two years. I am going to use that time for...not sure really. Whatever I feel I want or need to do. Or want or need to be. Or nothing at all.
So, I and my psychiatrist have agreed to give me some time to be with where I'm at, to take a crack at re-setting my sleep clock and generally just enjoy life as it is, without any external schedule. I had to make a contract with her that if I felt wonky in any way (beyond the normal wonky that is) I would get myself in to see her or head to a hospital. I agreed. I also have the support of my close friends and brother who will monitor me for any extreme changes in behavior, mood, etc.
My intention is just to follow the experiment that is my life right now. To be with it all. This may be the best thing I've ever done or the stupidest. But every choice in life, the ones worth making anyhow, can fall on either side of that fence. You never know until you know.