"If I were to begin life again,
I should want it just as it was,
only I would open my eyes a little more."
~~ Jules Renard
So, there's been some shifts happening in my life. Aren't there always? For the past two and a bit years of writing this blog, I've wanted an audience for my life. I dare say I even needed one. With all the major changes I experienced post-Jehovah's Witness and post-boyfriend, I needed a forum to share my defeats and my triumphs. Mostly though, I needed somewhere to document my journey and get all of the stuff that goes on in my head out of my head.
Now, things feel different. I'm enjoying having my journey be more private. I walk around most days with a Mona Lisa smile; I have a secret life. Not the kind of secrets I used to keep, those of shame and fear, but ones of joy and bliss and knowing. There are things unfolding in my awareness, in my life, that I cannot put words to even if I wanted to. There are things that make sense only to me, because I know where I've been and I know who I am and I know where I'm going. Serendipitous, beautiful, epiphanous moments are occuring at a rate that makes my head spin at times. And I'm loving every minute of it. Sure, there are moments where I lose my footing, but then I find my ground and move forward once more. And I am doing it myself. I am finding a strength in my soul that is surprising and yet, not surprising. It's like it was always there, just waiting for me to return home. I am remembering Who I Really Am. And it is all good.