"Sometimes what you want is not what is best for you."
This quote is from the new book by Conversations With God best-selling author Neale Donald Walsch. (By the way, CWG is a great book regardless of your perceptions of what "God" is. It was the book I read post-Jehovah's Witness that helped me re-write my concepts of the Divine.) Walsch's new book, When Everything Changes, Change Everything is blowing my mind right now. Quite literally. It's shifting the way I perceive change, myself, and life in general.
There are things I have wanted lately that I have not gotten. Relationships I have wanted that I have not gotten. Experiences I have wanted that I have not gotten. And it has lead to some upheaval and heartbreak and general discontent in my psyche.
And yet, if I am honest with myself, I can see a bigger picture unfolding in my life and see the truth of the quote above. If I am truly honest with myself, looking back on my life to date, I am happy that I have not received many of the things, relationships and experiences I wanted. If I had, I would've been thrown off balance, been greatly hurt or would've hurt others. So, it's all good.
And, in hindsight, I did eventually receive much of what I asked for, just in a different form or at a different time than I had originally wanted it. So, again, it's all good.
What I have also noticed is that when I tried to make things happen that ultimately were not for my highest good, I caused myself a lot of grief and pain. And you know when this is happening. You can feel that knot in your stomach telling you you're somewhere or with someone you shouldn't be. Or it just feels like there's obstacles each step of the way, blocks that seem to be whispering, "Let go. It's not time for this."
Oh so many times I have ignored that voice, resisting what is; paying attention instead to the petulant child of my psyche who screams, "I want what I want. And I want it NOW!!!"
I am learning to cradle that child in the arms of my heart, let her tears pass, and whisper quietly in her ear, "Be patient. You will receive all great and wonderful things. All in due time."
Walsch's book includes the incredibly moving and insightful poetry of his wife, poet Em Claire. Her poem, "What Is It That You Were Given?" struck a very strong chord with me and sums up the wisdom of accepting change and seeing goodness in all that unfolds in life.
And it's all good.