Friday, October 10, 2008


I was just reflecting on past relationships and my tendency to enter high-conflict situations. And the related tendency to create conflict, or at least feel drawn to create conflict, when there is peace. Somewhere within my psyche there is a belief system that the best learning comes from conflict. And I look at the world and can't help but think that most of the planet holds the same belief. Scary.

tall penguin


Tim said...

Funny how that works! I am generally conflict/drama-averse, but people that I know and love seem to have an uncontrollable attraction to conflict/drama.

I do believe that lessons learned when there is an emotional/conflict element remain more vivid in the memory.

As to your last comment, I think it's more of a squeeky wheel thing. The conflict-attracted folks generally tend to share their conflict with those around them, whereas the conflict-averse tend to keep to themselves (avoiding conflict).

tall penguin said...

I've actually managed to get to the point in my life where I keep most of the drama in my head and no longer inflict it on the outside world. That's progress.

What I find so interesting about human nature is our tendency to seek out conflict as a means of resolving our own inner turmoil, as if more outer drama could quell the inner one.

As the microcosm, so the macrocosm. Our outer world is merely a reflection of the inner world. I think that once we stop warring with ourselves on the inside we will, by extension, be able to create the external peace we say we desire. Not the other way around.