One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star.
I took a mental health day today. I called a co-worker to cover my shift at the bookstore and called in sick. I’ve had a migraine for three days. I don’t usually get migraines, so when I get one I know my body is telling me something I need to hear. Usually my body reacts when I’m taking life too seriously and spending too much time in my head and not enough time in my heart.
This week has been a lot to integrate for me. New job possibilities. Interviews. My annual review at my current job. And just to make it interesting, a number of unexpected jw triggers. Just when you think the past is dead and buried it rears its head once more. “We may be through with the past, but the past ain't through with us.” (Magnolia, screenplay by Paul Thomas Anderson)
So, I spent the day with myself, getting back into my body. Did some yoga. Had a light lunch. And cleaned my apartment. Cleaning house is the physical manifestation for the same mental act. When I want to “clean house” mentally and emotionally, I scrub my toilet, wash my dishes, sweep my floor. There is something zen in the repetitive action. It allows my mind to settle around the issues and before I know it, they’re not issues anymore. I usually collapse into laughter in the middle of my cleaning journey. And then, I pump up the music on my Itunes and dance around my clean space and remember what it is to be human. To be. Just be.
I wonder what it would be like if the whole world could stop and take a mental health day. What if the whole planet decided on one day where everything just stopped; where everyone just sat still for awhile; or spent time in nature just observing; or only did things that day that they really wanted to do. What would that look like?
I wonder what would have happened if George W. had declared a mental health day for the whole country after 9/11. A day of quiet. A day of reflection. A day of being. What would have happened?
Do we really need the chaos to give birth to the dancing star as Nietzsche suggests? I just don't know.