Tuesday, September 18, 2007

So get this...

As you know I got busted by the pharmacist and have been without my sleeping pills for over a week now. I finally saw my doctor today and told him how much better I feel mentally since stopping them, but how sick I've been. So he figures the sick is from withdrawal, and it's quite possible they were actually making my emotional state worse not better, especially once I started abusing them. I've never been a huge fan of pharmaceuticals. They have their place I guess, but I always wonder if they're making matters worse rather than better for me. Now, I wonder even more.

So I've been working to reset my body clock and my sleep patterns. It's going well. There's been a few rough nights but I'm surviving. It's the physical withdrawal I'm feeling that is harder to take than the not sleeping. I wake up at 4 am with flu-like symptoms, panic and flashbacks. Then I get nauseous, have an upset tummy and shake a lot. It's not fun. I guess this is what they call addiction. Hard to believe after only a year on the stuff. The brain is a funny place. You just never know what's really going on in there.

tall penguin

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi again,

This is ExJehovahsWitness from the richarddawkins.net forum.

I was listening to the audio from the beyond belief 2006 conference today and I heard something that I thought might be very important and possibly helpful for ex-witnesses dealing with the social rejection we feel.

http://www.abc.net.au/catalyst/stories/s1195656.htm

It's a study revealing that the pain caused by social rejection triggers the exact same areas of the brain associated with physical pain.

As someone who has experienced rejection and the loss of a long-term romantic relationship, this seemed important to me. And it also underscored the damage that the "society" can cause due to things like disfellowshipping, or as we should just honestly refer to it, shunning.

-Eric

Anonymous said...

Also, that has nothing to do with your post. Haha. Sorry about that.

tall penguin said...

Hey Eric,

Thanks for that link. Very interesting study. Explains a lot of what I'm feeling. I've always been very sensitive to physical pain and now I see why the emotional pain is just as difficult for me to process.

tall penguin